31 December, 2014

Live Today

 I grew up with someone who always couldn't wait until the new year. 
They focused so much on the negative of the past year, they just wanted to get rid of it.
I, for one, always went into the new year with trepidation. 
  I love the holidays and the coming of the new year was kind of a downer for me because that meant they were over.
This year was different for me and I want to change how I've been looking at things.
I've spent so much time saying "When I get better"
Or "I'll do it when I feel better."

Well it's got to stop.

With my diagnosis,  I have come to accept that I might not ever get better and I need to make the most of today.

I want to wake up in the morning and use my God given strength to do the best that I can for today. To remember that it's all I can do and it's ok.

SO I am forgetting 2014.
And I am forgetting 2015.

I am living for today.

Happy New Year from our family to yours, (however you may look at it.)

10 December, 2014

{A New} Home For The Holidays!

This past summer had us thinking about our future again since our lease was coming to an end. We really didn't want to continue to rent, but the thought of home ownership with health challenges kind of scared us a little.
After spending a lot of time in prayer and discussion we felt the time was right. We started looking casually before our vacation and then jumped in full speed at the beginning of August.
I will spare you all the roller coaster details, but after much exhaustion and stress, we became official homeowners the second week of October.
The house is WAY smaller than we wanted, but our goal was to always go with a bigger lot if we had to choose. After our time with NO yard in California, we both knew that it was very important to us.

Our home sits on over a third of an acre and I definitely don't feel claustrophobic when I step outside here. It was built in 1921 and has had multiple remodels.

It's not a perfect house, but it's where God has us for now and we are content!

Here is a walk through of our, new to us, humble little home:

Part of the backyard:

 Turtle's room:

Master bedroom: (aka storage room for a super small house)

Laundry and hall:

Kids/guest bath:

Hall shelves:

Living room:

Love this window, part of what sold the home for me:

Fireplace and mantle corner are the other things that got me: 


Dining room: (still lacking a table)

Monkey's room:

I'm not making any promises for blogging because life just isn't the same anymore, but I thank those few readers who have stuck around or missed me.

May you all have a wonderful Christmas season!!

11 September, 2014


We will accept goodies wrapped in tin foil. (Preferably chocolate.)

Every year I look back at that year and sometimes can't even imagine how we made it through. Others make it look so easy sometime.
But we are here.
And I think 10 is a pretty good number to smile about today.

I want to write a perfect post.
I want to write a post to encourage.
I want to write a post to to tell you that the next year will be the hardest.
I want to tell you to marry your best friend.
                     So that no matter now hard you fought that day, you forget by bedtime and treat them like you can't live without them.
I want to tell you that it's going to be oh so very hard sometimes.
I want to tell you that it's going to take away your breath other times.
But most importantly,
I want to tell you to always make room for the most important third wheel in your marriage.

Please don't ever stop fighting.
Please don't ever stop believing.
Please don't let statistics guide your journey.

Please dig down deeper that you've ever dug before to fight for your marriage.

Happy 10th Anniversary my Love!
Thank you for fighting every day with me.


08 September, 2014

B is for Books

Last week Turtle started 1st Grade. :)
So far she is liking the full day, but we've already had a couple days where she didn't have, or take, the time to eat lunch and was pretty cranky and famished by the end of the afternoon.

Here are the First day of School pictures and favorites:

Grade: 1st
Age: 6 and a half
Color: purple (in case you couldn't tell.)
Food: waffles (it's what she was eating when I asked her.)
Thing to so at school: Sit on the purple square on the rug at school.
Thing to play at home: Legos
Movie: Frozen

You can see her on her first day of Kindergarten HERE.

23 August, 2014


On the surface:

You see that mom that seems to have it all together?
Her floors are mopped, everything is neat and tidy in her house, and every speck of laundry is done.

You see that mom that seems to have everything organized.
She never misses an appointment, dates are never forgotten and she's on top of everything.

You see that mom with two kids.
One girl, one boy and she's told; how perfect.

You see that mom that's happily married.
The marriage is perfect and they're the cutest couple, (It kinda makes you sick.)

You see that mom always smiling in the family photos.

Do you know her?

Well sometimes that mom hides secrets.

She's admitted faults and weak point before.
But she's kept the pain of her body giving up on her, because someone else is always worse off.

Then one day she gets a diagnosis.
And that perfection just doesn't mean the same thing anymore....

She has Lupus.

And although right now the prognosis is positive , she know that at any moment her organs could give up, and life might not ever be the same.

SO yeah,
Perfection isn't always what it seems.

11 August, 2014

Laughter in the Field

Today I am struggling.

I am struggling with adulthood and all of the decisions, choices, pains and responsibilities we have.
I just wanted to spend all summer playing outside with my kids, but the decisions we have to make about our future, can no longer be ignored.
Instead of facing them head on and enjoying the challenge, I want to put my head in a hole and pray they go away.

I can't do that.

But I want to.

I want my aches and pains to go away by themselves and I don't want to spend countless hours and dollars on doctors.

But they aren't and I have to.

I am not normally a procrastinator. I usually like to work on the tasks that are in front of me.

But truthfully, right now, I am scared.

I want someone to take me by the hand, tell me it's going to be ok and make the decisions for me.

I want things to be as simple as they are in this field:

I want to remember, that all that is important, is in that picture.

And most importantly, my walk with God.

Nothing else.

It will all work out.

07 August, 2014


I am behind. (What a shocker!)

Our getaway was amazing. (I will hopefully post about it before it's old news.)

And we are so crazy busy right now. (Why is summer almost over?!!)

But today is this guy's birthday and I refuse to let it pass by without acknowledging it.


We'll spend some time celebrating him this weekend in the midst of our crazy schedules.

But in the meantime,

Happy Birthday My Love!!!

29 July, 2014

Random Tuesday 7/29

Ok truthfully this isn't random Tuesday.

Ok it is, but it isn't.

As you read this, it's Tuesday, but I really wrote this on Sunday.

It's a pre-scheduled post because this is day 1 of our 10 yr anniversary trip.

And I have a smile on my face.

Ok well I had a smile on my face when I wrote this.
I hope it's even bigger now.

But on to randomness...

I need help.
Or suggestions.

I have a bed wetter on my hands and we've tried everything.
We've cut off water at a certain point. We've tried waking him up at a certain point.
Nothing works. I am not going back to pull ups, they are too expensive.

I like laundry, don't get me wrong. But doing the same bedding constantly is starting to wear me thin. (Not to mention the bedding.)

He was doing so well for awhile, but then he's gone backwards fast.
And I'm running out of money for laundry soap.

So help, please. Anyone have any suggestions??

Hubby got baptized on Saturday. He surprised me a few weeks earlier by telling me he had already signed up. Super proud of him.
I would love to post pics and video, but I had to swear I wouldn't, so that's out.
So in turn, if you know him, congratulate him. I didn't promise him I wouldn't tell people. ;)

I am writing a post on Acceptance. It's going to be a long process though, because I am struggling to get my thoughts and emotions out. It's going to be based on: At what point do you fight for your health and at what point do you accept that you might not ever get better.
I think I am writing it more based on my need for personal peace, more than my need to share.

Anyway, I hope y'all have a great week.
I know I will! ;)

24 July, 2014

Rainy days

Last week we had record setting highs.

Yesterday we had a record setting amount of rain in 24 hours.

Last week the days flew by like crazy and the kids and I played outside for hours.

This week I am ready to bang my head against the wall by 3pm.

Last week spirits were high and excitement for our trip ahead was even higher.

This week the fighting is unbearable, everyone is at each others throats and I'm stressed about my health and meal planning.


I know, you need the lows to appreciate the highs.

But I'm just not feeling it this week and right now it's hard to look up and stay positive.

I was hoping to schedule some posts while we are away, but it literally took everything I have to get this out.

Thanks for letting me vent, friends.
I know there is sunshine around the corner.
But today the smile is a lot of work.

17 July, 2014

Our street in season.

When we moved into our house last fall, I started taking pictures of the view from our front yard.
When I looked over my pics recently, I realized I had one from each season. I thought it would be fun to share.

Kinda cool!

14 July, 2014

When you have a birthday in January.

...You get photo shoots in the summer.

I always feel bad for my daughter.
If you look back over the last 4 years, Monkey has all of these awesome outdoor birthday photo shoots, with amazing light and a great temp.
Turtle has "studio" shots with unreliable lighting and wrinkly backdrops.

So this year, when we did Monkey's photo shoot, I had her come along to the field for some quick shots.

Here are a few of my favorites:

{Just like her momma, flowers and messy hair}

{Personal fave}

{This series of photos cracks me up!}

~Thank you all for letting me share my children
  and my passion for photographing them.~