06 March, 2013

Temporary Housing

This post could go anyway, but I feel that true, sincere honesty is the only way it can go.

Your well meaning words have got to end.

Your questions about our future have got to stop.

By asking me how I am holding up or if my husband has a job lined up, you are only letting Satan use you as a tool to create doubt.

Doubt it not something I need right now.
Negativity is not something I need right now.
Trying to remind me I am a control freak that likes it my way, in my time, in my space is definitely not what I need right now.

The truth is,

We definitely do not know what we are doing.

If we used our move and the week leading up to our move as any indication, it would be all pointing at the wrong choice. (For example, our son came down with pneumonia and our neighbor backed into our car 2 days before we left....The list goes on.)

But we didn't make the choice. 
I can't focus on the fact that we will soon have no income, no home and no health insurance.
I can't have you continuing to point out the obvious and giving me looks of "you got to be crazy."

I can't spend all my waking moments trying to figure it all out.
It's NOT my job.

~ I am not suppose to be comfortable here on earth, it's not my home.

 Building 429 ~"Where I belong"

~I am to be completely supportive of my husband; Like when I get a phone call saying "how about North Dakota or Montana and moving again right away," I say for sure, whatever you want and then secretly get excited deep down knowing I will follow my husband to the moon and back because I love him that much. (This is not something that is for sure, but a possibility, for all you friends & relatives that are now freaking out....)

So when you say you will pray for us, 

please don't try to get a plan from us...you won't receive an honest one.
We don't have one.
But God does, and we are just along for the ride


  1. As a fellow control freak, I know how tough it came be when there is absolutely no way to control things...especially when it comes to uncertain futures. For me, it's easy to feel resentful at God for putting me through that kind of torture, and I am always asking, "I've prayed and prayed and begged and begged for you to show me a glimpse into my future...just so I have peace of mind that everything is going to be ok."...and when he doesn't show me right away, I get mad. It's just Satan's evil little way of getting to me. I've learned through uncertainty is when I've grown the most spiritually (cause I tend to talk A LOT more to God). Kind of like our church situation...I was so mad that God hadn't planted us in a church right away when we moved out here, that we straight up gave up looking for a church for a good 2 1/2 months! Those 2 1/2 months were rough...I was depressed with the weather, the new city, the lack of friends, and everything! I quit praying because I was so discouraged, lonely, and miserable...which we all know is the worst time to stop praying, but I was so mad at God at that point that I didn't care. It's crazy that one night, when I couldn't sleep, is the night I decided to pray. I found the church we now attend THAT NIGHT! I hope my story gives you a little encouragement as you head into your uncertain and scary future. Just don't make my mistake and stop praying!

  2. Always thinking about you and yes God does have a plan.

  3. As a military member & spouse I empathize with your situation. It's definitely hard not knowing. I'm adding your family to my prayers!



  4. Praying for you and hoping these last few weeks have brought some clarity for your family!


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