09 May, 2010

Mother's Day "to me"

First and foremost: HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!
Mother's Day has always been full of mixed emotions for me...
...some people who want more than anything to be a mom look at this day as bittersweet. They love their mom's but would give anything to hold a baby of their own...
....some mother's are doing this world's most difficult job all by themselves and this is just another day. They don't have someone to bring them breakfast or flowers or to give them a day off. (That goes for us "single" military wives who are mom's also.)
...some mom's just lost a child this past year, (or even previous years) and have to go through the most the horrible pain and memories all over again.
 Please also remember these people today.
*****
I LOVE my mom,...
But to tell you the truth, I have hard time every year picking out a mother's day card.
I have never had an extremely close relationship with my mom. She was a stay at home mom for most of my life and did her absolute best to keep our family in running order.
But we just have opposite personalities.
When I was younger and we clashed, I was always told you will understand her and have a better relationship with her when you are older. Now I will admit we have a better relationship and I can understand now why she made some of the choices she made while we were growing up. But I still don't have that relationship that so many of my friends do with their mothers.
Do I feel bad?
sometimes...
But at the same time, I am almost thankful we were/are so different.
 It was God's way of raising me and preparing me for the lifestyle that I was going to live. If I had parents that I was EXTREMELY close to, I don't think I could be the proper Marine wife my husband needs. I know a lot of military marriages that have broken apart because the female cannot quite separate herself from her family and put her husband first.
So how do you purchase a mothers day card for someone you want to thank for clashing with you to make you who God needed you to be. When I was younger I didn't agree with a lot of my mom's decisions. Was it because they were wrong? NO It's because we are two different people that think differently.
I know some might read this and think this whole situation is horrible, but I don't.
Like I said I love my mom!
When I became pregnant with my first child at the age of 26, I was thrilled when she wanted to fly to come help out for the first week and a half!

{This is what I looked like when she stepped off the plane! Its the first time she had seen me pregnant and was in major shock!}:
She got to witness the birth of my daughter and had to endure my horrible labor and delivery right along with us. (Which she says, even after having 4 kids and seeing other births, was an absolute horrific experience for her.) ;)
{This is my first real sight of my first-born after she was born...the day I became a mom!}
{And this my dear friends, is my mom with her 6th grandchild, 2 days before she flew back home on February 7th, 2008}

And we haven't seen her since.
Sometimes you just cant be with your family all the time. Money doesn't grow on trees as we have all experienced at some point and when the military has you living 3000+ miles apart, you have to take what you can get.
The good news is, we live on the same coast now, and in 7 and half weeks, my mom will fly down again to see the little 2 years old granddaughter she left at 12 days old and to meet another grandson!
Does my mom wish she could see our family more?
Yes, most definitely!
Do I wish we could see our families more and have our children know/meet their relatives??
OF COURSE!
BUT....
Again it leads me back to my upbringing!
I am who I am, and I think I turned out decent.
But just because someone isn't still attached to their mom by the hip doesn't mean that person doesn't know what their mom did for them and appreciate how it turned out.
Love u mom!

2 comments:

  1. I didn't realize it has been that long since you have seen your mom. I have the privilege of having her as one of Matthew's Sunday School teachers. =)
    Thanks for your thoughts, Marcella! I can sort of relate.

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  2. Love hearing more about you and your story...you are a strong lady my friend and you deserve the happiest of mother's days! Less than 8 weeks!!!!!!

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